Things We Won't Call Our Magazine

1. Boise Poets Are Lame
2. Stuff Stinky Hippies Wrote
3. June Moon Spoon
4. Brought To You By Time Warner
5. Watch Out For Paper Cuts
6. The Dalai Lama Wrote This
7. This Font Sucks
8. Pornographic Flip Book
9. Free to Prostitutes
10. You're Not In This Issue
11. Best Episode Ever
12. Things We Plagiarized
13. Morning Becomes Eclectic
14. Snot
15. Friends in Low Places
16. Produced on Company Time
17. Stuff Other Magazines Rejected
18. What Do You Want For Free?
19. The Blog Less Traveled
20. Dirty Word
21. Two For One Coupon
22. New York Times Crossword Puzzle
23. Aluminum Foil Hat
24. Accompanied by Ben Folds
25. Honest Politicians